Thursday, July 9, 2009

Five Weeks Old

I can't believe our little Olivia Ann is already five weeks old! (This is Jessica, by the way.) I just read our last blog entry, which Chad wrote the day Olivia was born, and mentioned that I would probably blog "tomorrow". Oops...

Well, life has been a whirlwind since our precious girl was born, and I didn't get that blog written. Life with two kiddos is a little a very good way, but crazy none the less. =) Olivia seems very healthy at this point, and we feel blessed to be able to say that. Time will tell, as we watch her develop, if the TTTS had any permanent negative effects. Right now, though, we are just overjoyed that she is here, and we love her no matter what.

She really is a pretty easy baby. She cries when she is hungry or occasionally when she wants to be swaddled tighter, but for the most part is very happy. She brings me so much joy. I love to watch her little expressions, watch her little body wiggle, feel her hand grasp my finger, play with her crazy head of hair, snuggle her close to me, laugh as she sticks her little tongue out when she is hungry...I could go on and on.

It is amazing to watch Emily with Olivia...she is totally in love with her little sister. When Olivia cries, Em comes running, volunteering to hug her, kiss her, give her a pacifier, or "hold" her. We laugh at how Emily uses this cute, high-pitch voice when talking to Olivia. She repeats little phrases we use to soothe Livie, and it's so much fun hearing these things come from this little two year old acting like another little mommy. =) We are practicing being gentle: not to squeeze Olivia too tight or force her pacifier into her mouth. Em is trying, but it is hard when you are at the age where the more you love something, the more aggressively you show that love!

We continue to be so blessed by so many. Thank you for the many gifts, cards, emails, meals, etc. that have been sent our way. Most of all, thank you for the prayers that have been said on our behalf. Knowing people have been praying for Olivia's safe arrival has encouraged and sustained us.

We also appreciate your prayers for our hearts and healing process over losing Allie. I'll admit, it was really difficult right after Olivia was born. There were many moments of joy, finally having our beautiful Olivia here, but moments of grief as we dealt with another phase of losing Allie. We did have a small service at her grave site with our pastor, Steve, and his wife Terry. It was the hardest thing we've done, but at the same time, it was what our hearts needed. Like I've said before, I will never be "over" losing Allie, but the having the service brought a lot of peace and the start of some healing I felt couldn't happen until after delivery.

So God has brought me to a good place. Allie is living a life of complete joy with Him, which is what I want for all of my girls. And right now, I have two amazing, beautiful, precious little girls with me, and an incredible husband, for whom my love has deepened even more through all of this. I am extremely blessed.

I just want to say that as we have journeyed through this difficult time in our lives, we have watched family and friends go through their own difficult struggles. We want you to know that we have appreciated your love and support in spite of your own trials, and we are lifting you up in our prayers too. We so desperately want to be a support to each of you, as there are so many kinds of hurts and troubles out there, and we don't want you to face them alone.

May God richly bless each and every one of you!

Love, Jessica